ashlenblythe.com

Responsibility is defined as the state of being accountable or to blame for something, or the opportunity to act independently and make decisions. As leaders, we are accustomed to being held accountable for our team’s results, and you don’t get to that place if you are not able to make decisions. I’ve been challenged recently to think about the internal processes that make personal and professional responsibility possible. What abilities have great leaders honed that make them able to weather difficult times? It’s easy to be accountable when everything is going well. It’s certainly not the most comfortable position to be in when mistakes are made. The ability to own our mistakes, and successes. As happens often, I’m reminded of football…. Being a Detroit Lions fan is not easy. It’s been easier the last few years, but still a challenge. Many times since I have been a fan I have seen my team come within inches of winning a game, only to be robbed by a bad call, or s

How discipline in the small things leads to success In an earlier post, I wrote about my hatred for taking out the trash. What I didn’t make note of, is that I love having a clean kitchen. There’s nothing more satisfying than walking into the kitchen and seeing no dirty dishes, a shiny clean stove, a crumb free floor, counters with nothing on them but what belongs in a nice orderly fashion. It just feels better not walking into a mess. If I want to cook something, I have a nice clean space to work in. The best part is that if the kitchen is clean, I don’t have the looming anxiety of needing to put in the work to clean it, it’s done. The problem of course is getting to that point. The process of cleaning the kitchen is not so fun. Not because it’s particularly difficult, there are just things that are more fun that I’d rather be doing. I believe that personal discipline is one of the most important qualities for anyone who wants to make an improvement in their life. The pr

One of the things I've been accused of a few times in my life has been talking too much. Whenever I think about it, many of the people in my life that have left the greatest impression on me, only spoke when they had something good to say. Many others speak, and eventually say something worth listening to. In my career, I have to do a lot of speaking. There are many different words for it. Teaching, training, directing, but it all boils down to expressing . Sometimes I express information, methods, or strategy. Other times I express a sense of urgency, or passion.  Most of our lives both at work and at home involve a lot of expressing. So what are the skills that make someone a great communicator? Why should we care about improving those skills? I don’t want my child to just hold my hand when we cross the road. I want him to understand why he should be safe. I don’t want a team member to only understand the task they are assigned, I want them to care about its executio

A short rant about perspective and positivity.  My wife recently updated her Facebook status asking friends to say how their day was going using only a GIF. I started to notice as the GIFs rolled in that most were negative. Lots of heads banging against hard objects, things that should work not working. GIFs that depicted general craziness and mayhem filled the comment section. The consensus among those that participated was that this was not a good day. Why is it so natural to think of what makes our lives so frustrating and difficult, yet so challenging to recognize how fortunate we are? I am guilty of this daily and challenged by it. Here’s an example. A typical Monday is not something I look forward to. It starts too early for one. I need just a little more sleep (the walking dead or SNF). When I do get up, I know the day is going to be packed so there’s no reason to make a lunch because there's no time to eat if I want to be home before 7. The rest of the day is

If there’s one chore I hate more than any others, it’s taking a bag full of garbage from inside my house, to a dumpster outside. It makes no sense that I would loath such a simple and easy task, but I would rather cut off my fingertips and dip my hand into pure lemon juice than take the trash out. Before marriage, I had no one to gently and lovingly remind me that this needed to be done. I would continue to pack as much garbage into the can as possible and take it out only when necessary. There is nothing less appealing than an overflowing trash can. It’s a deterrent. It keeps business away, attracts pests, and it will eventually get the neighbors very concerned. Today a situation at work reminded me of how much my ego can be like an overflowing trash can. I received a “punch up” email from someone who doesn’t work in my building and isn’t really my boss “reminding” me to complete a task that was overdue. I thought to myself “It should be overdue because that task is useless and

Lessons from ineffective coaches  I've had a lot of coaches. From grade school sports teams and teachers, to bosses in the real world. Some have been incredibly impactful on my life, and given me the support and tools to be successful. They stand out as mentors that I'll be grateful for and always remember well. There are others who were just as impactful, but for totally different reasons. Not all important lessons need to be learned from good leaders. You can learn a lot from someone who doesn't fit into your idea of what a coach should look like. Here are a few examples of how poor leadership made me better(some details may be changed to protect the innocent). That one time I was too slow I loved being a part of a team when I was a kid. I got to hang out with my friends and be a part of something bigger than me. People relied on me. However, on my 4th grade baseball team there was one problem, I rarely got to play. Keep in mind this was in the late 90s when the

What are things that hold us back? From achieving more at work? From being better husbands, wives, fathers, mothers, friends? From starting to write down the ideas that we have or to be bold and confront the things that challenge us? Is there something in your life that you have held back from the people you love? What most often gets in the way of our forward progress? Speaking for myself, fear is the most central, boiled down answer for the questions above. Having lived just enough of life to have experienced deep embarrassment( I won't go into detail) and occasional humiliation, those are feelings I'd rather not revisit. I'm afraid of saying the wrong thing. I'm afraid of not being liked. I'm afraid of making the wrong choices, and I'm definitely afraid of choosing to be disciplined when I'd rather life be easy. Watching my 2-year-old play in the yard yesterday I observed some interesting behavior(as most toddler interactions are interesting, to s